Winter prayers


Abracadabra. I create as I speak, or as I think. It manifests within minutes, seconds even.

I remember something I was shown once walking between worlds; the web wisely organized, like a symphony; every tiniest aspect playing its part, but until then the moment wasn't ripe. A melody so strong rose. It was me. My song. Everything I was. And I understood. Why. It all came together. And I rose. I saw intelligence and love behind the hardships. Behind the intensity of this gOd's game with us. I remember why we obliged. My soul rejoiced, because it was succeeding. It had drawn towards it everything it ever wanted, and it stretched far and wide and loved and shined. And there was peace and harmony in its vicinity. Its wave took on momentum. That new vibration echoed and ricocheted in every far corner of a greater universe.

I also understood that drawing towards you everything you need isn’t necessary peace and quiet, but also and actually, only noisy, violent, earthquaking, annoying, troublesome and painful even, because you really need its lessons or because a part of you is resisting and thus creating that tension.

Manifesting for you in your close relations is yourself. The part of you, you don’t know is you. Especially the really weird, mad, super spiritual, talking to all of gOd’s creations, those existing on all levels and planes and realms of existence.. if you have a close relation in your life like that, YOU too are equally as raving weird, open to all those realms and planes of existence and you are mad too, only you’re probably in complete denial of it, and so that energy has to find outlet through someone close to you. (Aren’t Universal Laws marvelously funny?)

Didn’t we just create? Everything we wanted? Day 2 in, from the final Fire New Moon and the portals of fertile seeds. We did throw things in that Fire we knew we didn’t need anymore, an ocean that took away the final memory.. A smoothened, softened black rock that was once liquid black erupted Fire? Taken from the sacred landscape I know to be my home of homes. An exchange. Instead we planted. Intended manifestation. Didn’t ‘give and take’ dissipate then and there? Isn’t it where we saw that Blue light, in our hearts and on the night sky? Within as without? Didn’t we take the Sacredness to the next level? Didn’t we exchange vows and merge?

I shiver as I see a vision entirely different. A new void. The merging that had momentum, put on hold it dissipates and folds and withdraws altogether. And cannot and will not come back again.

Alive in me, flowing through me, softening everything that was hardening, those words in my ears, that does hear, The O language spoken so caringly and encouragingly. Having been seen with the One eye instead of the human two that sees too often only themselves in the mirror of projection, I know again I am lOve. Hope appears. Something that was freezing inside begins to thaw.

The gentle reminder amidst the hopelessness, that love is hard and needs a lot of work, but lOve flows and is easy cause it’s all we are and ever will be. I know again what I put in those vows. What I manifested. Wisdom makes sure I also know how quickly it manifests, once thought, once imagined. How magical beings we are at this stage of time. That all that beautiful Mars energy is our connection to all creativity, and I know instantly, instinctively, why will is so hard to give in on, why you fight sometimes as if your life depended on bending everyone to your will. I saw dying and death rooted right there. And when released and raised, it’s the greatest illusion but also the only thing that binds us here. Bound or free? lOve or love? And instead I saw life and living. But I also saw that if you do not believe you are lOved, you are utterly unable to receive lOve. Going through life unaware what lOve could have done for you.

I know what to change, I know how to work. I know what to heal. I only can’t do it alone.

I hope the seeds we planted are growing faster than this energy now, and thus manifesting everything we intended that magical afternoon. I hope the Angels hear my prayers. I hope. I hope the hearts are opening. I hope the minds are opening. I hope more truths can be accepted. About ourselves too, so self-responsibility can open new doors, growth is creating momentum again. I hope the flowers penetrate the frozen ground soon. I hope. I hope. I hope.

Prayer is my only warmth throughout these silent, white winter cold days.

Image Credit: Snowy Forest by Nancy F Photos

​© 2020 by Camila Reland

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