The world tilts a little, and as if it hasn’t been a constant movement, I feel the wobble and the gentle shake beneath my feet. The ground feels momentarily unstable. I pause. And breathe. I heed the whisper.
‘Stop. Take a break.The World is about to slow down..So should you.. You’ve been here before, pushing prematurely.. Now is a time of quiet serenity. Observing nothing but beauty before this natural end of a series of ends, to let the new breathe.’
Flashes of sharp visions of memory pulsates through the cerebral. Echoes of both laughter and pain. Joy and sorrow. But mostly of love. Playfulness. Ancient souls with youthful zest exchanging love. Making the same mistakes again, but solely for the purpose of getting it right.
The wisdom in knowing darkness holds creation. From darkness light springs. ‘But why darkness at all? Why not just light?’ And the wisdom to hold to one’s truth through it. Smelling the cracks of fire once again. How many times must we burn for the truth?
That for all of us all the journeys of this transformative year were necessary. Like a culmination of years and journeys that were done ahead, all leading up to this. All the steps taken. The impossible re-union of true flow would only be possible once the many karmic obstacles were removed. Why interpret those challenges for anything else than what they are? Why this fear of change? Of release? Of seeing through the ego stories? The beautiful Shadow work, is but a dance with your darkness. It’s but a shadow. There to make you whole. Soul work. The World wobbles because it too dances with our shadows. It’s love in a endless vortex offering us the same forward movement. Nowhere is the motion backwards found.
Would you? Deny your essence? Do you? There is only lOve. There was never anything else. Give up the battle, you are on track.
Are you still sleeping? Clinging to a life that has rules that keep you caged? Or keeping constant aware? Dodging the bullets of attack for breathing your truth. LOving is all the same. To become the Candle, one must first burn. Stay in lOve. There is no other place to go. Always the prayer: Fire walk with me.
I feel the weariness in my bones. I feel the aches and the jolts that are tired from a year of running this marathon. I see the marks of age upon my face, though the shine in my eyes is younger. Still only coming to life.
I stand in the naked forest trying to remember time. Certain events seem like eons ago already. How so much can happen in such a short time span. Surely years and years must have snuck in and passed within this one. Loops or worm holes. Making us live the lives we never got to do, but in these early stages of actuality they were needed. Instant loving. Instant living. The blue lights flicker faster. I have always known him, I have always been with him.
There is magic in my forest. The words I cast are spells. Every single one of them. Simply. I know magic.
The surrender comes in the embrace. The wet leaves. The smell of the Earth. Heart to heart. Ear to ground. Even if she’s frozen, she’s wildly alive. She finds my language and whispers and tells me of every earth quake, of every foot stamping her vibration, of every drum beat, every resembling Soul rhythm and that’s the primary music we make.
I cast my voice into the wind and sing to find my missing souls somewhere in Eternity. Among them I call my Home to me. I call my New Year to me. Blessings for the Old. Joy for the New. She forgives me for the promises I couldn’t keep. The things I could not give. ‘You will try again and succeed.’ She shows me the energy surrounding the One Pledge I did give. The golden thread. The one I do keep. Nothing else matters. It holds enough magic for all eternities to come.
And for a brief, but welcome moment I take a break. To breathe. Pause and reflect. To stretch the aching muscles. Tend to the tired body. Mend the bruises. Just gaining strength.
Knowing that all is truly well. I can release this year and welcome the New.
I am safe. Within as without.