First Full Moon


The old follows me home, though I know I am brand new. The night is holy. Laden with light coming to being born on this Earth and make us receive the New Hope. The ultimate Christmas. Receiving! Open up our hearts and just receive. This is no thing. This is the smallest of miracles, but one that can grow to be the biggest yet, if we accept and then nourish it. She hangs above me, the bright white Goddess, making sure I have understood this cycle to the fullest. From the last dawn to the first breath and through to the very End. On this holy night. New purpose is born within. The things we threw on the fire and willingly let behind is already making room for the choices of the Heart. I see where she points. It casts a white ray of light into the very core of my Light House. She is making me see it really has no basement. There is room for many things, and it can stand the crazy idea I had since childhood to fill up every room with Water to swim or sail through the house. But there is no basement and I'm on the 7th floor. There is strength and wisdom now in the few white strands of my hair. The sight able to stretch farther and seeing other dimensions. The full picture. There is that kind of peace within that follows after a storm. Though the eyes have cried oceans of tears, the heart broke in all kinds imaginable every day, and the maddening thoughts running wild with fear while enduring and resisting them, the standing still and not moving, not acting, not running made me a 100 years older every second, I am like a new born in my life. The angry heart calm and the wild woman eased. I let myself out. To freedom. Her shine breaks through the clouds just long enough to make me see her, long enough to be reminded what comes next. Strength and wisdom in the emotional heart. The scared girl that finally became a Woman by being allowed to die and not kept alive. Not by words. By deeds. And my time comes now to live it and be it. He held my heart through all this. My Heart and my Soul. Gently, but cleverly. The oceans of love are easily drowned in if you don’t learn to swim and keep your head above water. This is the human process. You’ll see if you have perseverance and true love, when the storm comes. Luckily we met defying one, so we know we what we can do. Crossing through time and space and all the star crossed things. But now comes the time of walking together. The Fire is burning. The flames are alive. Spring is coming. But first a full celebration and a reminder of the importance of this beautiful cycle. Happy Full Moon. I will be dancing. Oh, I will. 12:12

​© 2020 by Camila Reland

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